Those of you that know me know that at the end of 2010 I started the Top 10 Douchebag list. It was a hit and many people kept asking me to do a new list for 2011. Will you make the list year? Is it a good thing or bad thing to make this list? As you know I don’t care if I offend people. I always say: If you don’t have haters you aren’t doing it right. So on to the list this year…..
Once again. You should be proud that you made the list. Just like last year you are a douchebag for wanting to read this list. Most of you reading this list asked me when it was coming. So this spot is pretty self-explanatory. You should run and tell all your friends you are now famous because you made the LyricistFan.com Douchebag List two years in a row.
9. Premium Pete
This guy is the ultimate ass-clown in the sneaker world. He wants to ride on everyone’s coattails and act like every idea he steals is his own. According to him he invented elephant print. Yeah, ok Pete. Keep thinking that. Also, why do you keep calling yourself Premium Pete? You don’t even work at that shop anymore. If I worked at Supreme and my name was Steve, I would go by Supreme Steve, but if I got fired from Supreme I would definitely drop it from my name. I guess Pete doesn’t understand that concept.
8. Hypebeasts/Wannabe Resellers
This category blankets a large number of you reading this. These people will wait in line for 5+ hours to cop one pair and flip for $30 profit. I just don’t see the point in that. These are also the same people that cop a sneaker, flaunt it for 2 days and then put it up for sale. Who you trying to impress? You only copped those kicks because the internet told you to. These kids do need to be educated in the sneaker world, but we should not be responsible for that. There is plenty of information online for them to educate themselves. Thanks to these douchebags for ruining the sneaker world.
7. DJ Delz
If you follow me on Twitter, it is obvious why he made this list. For those of you that don’t know, this guy has been copping fakes for years, but swears he is a sneaker god. He lies constantly. Come on fam, only an idiot would believe someone at Jordan Brand sent you those DB 4’s for free. We know you paid rape but you’re too afraid to admit it. So, recently Delz made a video comparing early release Black Cements to store-bought Black Cements. He tried to make them seem the same, but he was too dumb to notice the differences. He was backing these pre-order sites heavy, but then he figured out they sold fakes, so one day he does a video saying he won’t cop early kicks anymore, then the very next day he posts a video of an early release. This clown shouldn’t be respected by anyone. He just started copping kicks two years ago and acts like an OG. You ain’t fooling anyone Marcus, oh and no one in the music business ever heard of you.
This guy is the biggest douchebag on the list (literally). So this guy re-tweets every half-assed compliment he receives on Twitter. I guess he was never hugged enough as a child, but I don’t blame his parents because they couldn’t get their arms around him. He acts like he is king shit of the Air Force 1 world, yet he’s only been buying Air Force 1’s since 2004. Don’t let him front and act like he’s been doing it forever. Like Hov said “We don’t believe you, you need more people.”
5. DJ Clark Kent
Not much to say about Clark that hasn’t already been said by me. For those that don’t know back when the LeBron 7 came out Clark emailed me telling me to call him and, reluctantly, I did. He then proceeded to ask where a certain sneaker that I purchased came from. I refused to tell him and he threw a “bitch fit.” Too bad I paid less for them than he was selling for. But that’s beside the point for this list. I will never understand why Nike still lets him design sneakers. 85% of his collaborations with Nike sit on shelves in the outlets. The only reason the 112 LeBron is so popular is because they never released. Maybe one day he will actually design a dope sneaker, maybe one day a unicorn will fly out of my ass, but both seem highly unlikely.
I don’t want to say too many bad things about this guy since he may crap out in his senior citizen home. This guy tried to tell me he “influences millions” with his sneaker reviews. If he influences millions, I feel sorry for society today. He knowingly cops fakes and doesn’t have enough knowledge to know they are fakes. But then again we can always blame that on his 93-year-old eyes that don’t really let him see the details. Instead of paying rape for kicks he should invest in Lasik eye surgery and a new colostomy bag. He recently bought an early release Jordan X where the Jordan letters on the box were clearly upside down and he continued to say they were really good quality. Someone do all us a favor and return him to his old folks home.
3. Ronnie Fieg
What can we say about Mr. Fieg? This guy makes by far the most hideous sneaker and boot designs, yet the young hypebeasts flock to his every release. He makes all his collaborations extremely limited because he knows he can’t sell out a 10,000 pair production sneaker. He also likes to act like he is King Humble, which is by far the biggest stretch of the truth since Clinton said he did not inhale. He pats himself on his back more than Kanye does. The best part is when his crew takes shots at him on Twitter and they don’t even realize they are clowning their boy. One day Ronnie, maybe you will understand your sneaker and boot designs suck. That day can’t get here soon enough.
2. Tim Tebow
Ok Tim, we get it, you love God. And in about 25 years we will find out you have a secret camp in the jungle like Marlon Brando in Apocalypse Now, but instead of soldiers you will have oriental pre-teen boys running around that are your love slaves. We know you love God but calm down already, just because your pastor touched you when you were a youth don’t mean you saw the light of God. I would respect you more as an athlete if ESPN would hop off. Hell ESPN is comparing you to Lin just to keep your bible thumping ass in the media. It’s time to give it a rest.
Once again, I made the top of the list. Just making this list alone should put me at the top. I get called an asshole or douchebag almost every day. I have no issue with that either. Some will call it “hating” but what is there for me to hate on? I have rare kicks, I don’t give a shit, and I will never care what others say. That right there earns me the crown for the second year in a row.
Thank you for taking the time of your busy porn watching day and reading this list. Please share this post with every one-arm drug dealer, a half-legged hooker, your PO, and everyone else you know.